“Why do you stay as a single mom?”

Random dude: “Wow, you’re gorgeous! Why are you single? Something must be wrong with you?”

After I roll my eyes, I say “Because I haven’t found anyone worth me not being single.”

It’s the questions I abhor, but one I’m sure you get a lot as well!

(Between you and me, his commentary would be why he does not have my number.

Are guys clueless? Has their life been so easy that they can’t fathom why a good woman could still be single? Well, yes and no. Read on to find 5 reasons why women are still single and why we must respect their process. (I Periscoped this topic a while back. Deets coming soon on how to watch all 113 of my scopes soon!)

Top 5 Reasons Single Moms are still Single

We want to be

I know this seems so far-fetched, but a good many of us just want to chase our goals, raise our kids, and get balanced enough to appreciate a good love. Cut us some slack! We are not necessarily damsel in distress. (Throws handkerchief and glides across the room) However, we would love a strong brother to help out. We are coming Boaz. 🙂 I also admit that for the right man, we’ll put some of that dream chasing to the side. We single not crazy! Ladies, be on the lookout for that good man.

We’re Scared

To folks who don’t understand:Have you been left to parent alone? Are you raising kids all by yourself and doing EVERYTHING? Well then, it’s scary to date again after having that happen.

But, sis, even with that, you do have to try again. You weren’t made to live alone. I don’t care how many monks they have in the mountains praying and content with it. Listen, I need a mate, and so do you. Get over that fear and try again!

The Timing is All Wrong

Yes, it’s true- sometimes you have to let some new love go on his way. Especially if he has a chance of a lifetime opportunity. I mean would you pass up working in the London office for 6 figures? Nope! But, you two can keep in touch. So, do that and it may work out!

Prospects

Sometimes you can look high and low and there still are no datable or marriageable men around. What do you do? You take that as a sign to work on you and your dreams. Eventually, you’ll run into someone worth your time. I know what it feels like to be in a geographical location with no prospects. In that case, like me, you may have to move. Sorry. It is like that sometimes. Go where you can thrive. Remember that.

You still need to heal

This is the main culprit I believe as to why some single moms are still single. And you know what? It’s for good reason. No one sings up for this and so women have to take the time to heal. Now, don’t stay stuck too long. Get up, out, and on to living. One monkey (ex) doesn’t stop the show as my grandma used to say! lol! So, don’t let it stop you from meeting the person who can actually love and appreciate you.

There are more reasons for why you and I are a single mom, but what I really want to drive home is that people are single for various reasons. We should let them be. When single moms are ready to date, they will. Until they are ready, the blind dates and setups will be futile. Encourage them, help them out, come alongside them on their journey, but don’t rush them.

I’m curious. Would you add any others to the list? Sound off in the comments!

Yes! It’s Single Mom Sunday! That means I’ll see you at 7 PM CST on Periscope so we can discuss “What’s YOUR perfect relationship?”

Need some motivation on your journey? Check out my new audio titled Single Parenting 101!